AllTopix

Miscellaneous: Bear Hunting

One day Fred decided he wanted to take up deer hunting. So Fred went to the local sporting goods stored and asked the shopkepper. "I need a really nice gun to hunt deer with"The shopkeeper gave him a gun and said, "This gun is perfect for any deer"Taking the gun, and jumping into his Jeep the new hunter went into the woods to search for deer. While looking around for his new sport, he saw nothing. Then, when he was just about ready to give up he saw a Bear in the distance. Not wanting to waste this journey he took aim and, BOOM!! When the smoke cleared to his surprise, no bear.Suddenly, Fred felt a tap on his shoulder. Turning, he saw the bear."What the hell do you think you are doing? " asked the bear."I'm sorry, I did mean to, I'll never do it again!" whined Fred."Pull down your pants, just so you understand how serious I am" explains the Bear.Reluctantly, Fred does this and WHAM, the bear screws him up the ass.All pissed off Fred drives away muttering, "I'm going to get that fuckin' bear, no fuckin bear is going to that to me".Fred goes goes bak to the sporting goods store and buys a larger gun, and goes back to the park.Looking around he finally sees the bear. Picking up his new larger gun, points, and BOOM!When the smoke clears, no bear. Fred feels a tap on his shoulder, turns around and there's the bear."I'm sorry, I'll never do it agian, I promise", screams Fred."I thought I told you not to come back here again", exclaims the bear, "now pull down your pants.Fred does so and the bear fucks him up the ass again.Fred gets in his jeep and drives away muttering, "That's it, I'm going to blow that fuckin bears head clean off"When he gets back to thte sporting goods store he explains to the shopkeeper, "I want the largest gun you have, the most powerful."The shopkeepers hands him a gun and says, "This one is great for hunting elephants, no creature on this planet will live after a shot from this"Fred gets back in his jeep and drives back to the woods. Loooking around he spots the bear again. He aims, pulls the trigger, and BBBOOOOOMMMMMM!!!!!!!When the smoke clears, no bear. Fred scared now, feels a tap on his shoulder, turning around he sees the bear."You're not in this for the sport anymore, are you? "

---

Please contact our mods if this joke is questionable.